Skip to main content

ADHD & My Marriage: Intro


For 7 years of my marriage, neither my husband or I knew that my husband has adult ADHD. We didn’t know that ADHD has been affecting our relationship negatively for years. It’s been an “unknown” third wheel in our marriage.

While we didn’t know the name of this particular marital affliction, we always knew or sensed something was off in our marriage. We spent many years going to various marital counselors off and on with hopes of trying to understand all our issues and what we individually contributed to our marital problems. Is it “we were just incompatible.” And if we were, how did we miss all the red flags? Or better yet, did we just ignore them?

We didn’t know he had adult ADHD until we met with a particular marital counselor who specializes in ADHD and recognized the signs we had unknowingly missed. However, the signs were there. For example, my husband had a previous diagnosis as a child with ADHD. He took medication for a short time and that was it. We thought it was something he had “outgrown”. According to the article on Verywell.com called, “Do Kids Outgrow ADHD?” by Keath Low, “ADHD changes overtime, but it’s rarely outgrown...In most cases, kids with ADHD grow up to be adults with ADHD” (Low).

Before my husband’s new diagnosis, I sometimes wondered, if we were the only ones going through this.  Our marriage being too hard, we didn’t love each other enough, we’re too selfish or incompatible never felt like adequate explanations for the challenges. I knew in my heart, that there had to be a better reason to explain the random and frequent drive-by of heated disagreements, bewildering miscommunication, and poor resolutions. Think of the game mine craft. Sometimes you hit a mine, and other times you don’t. At times you hit mine after mine. Or hit no mines for a while, and think it’s too good to be true. The other shoe must be waiting to drop at any moment.

Sources
1.   Low,  Keath, and Steven Gans. “Do Kids With ADHD Become Adults With ADHD?” Verywell, Very Well.com, 15 Feb. 2017, www.verywell.com/do-kids-outgrow-adhd-20509.      

Last Edited: January 25, 2018
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Clear Blue Plus Pregnancy Test (Blue Dye)

Clear Blue Plus Pregnancy Test  with Blue Dye (+ / - ) This is what a negative looks like: Side Note: Blue dyes are often said to more frequently give false positives than pink dye. Some online boards that will tweak (alter) a pregnancy test photo to help individuals identify if the test is a faint positive or indeed negative, often will not do blue dyes.
1 comment
Read more

Frida Mom for Post Laparoscopy Care

  My Frida Mom Basket for Post-Laparoscopy Care. Why I Love the Frida Mom Line (Even Beyond Motherhood) One of the things I’ve really come to appreciate is how versatile the Frida Mom line is—not just for new moms, but for anyone recovering from abdominal surgeries, such as laparoscopies for endometriosis. After surgery, comfort and gentle care are everything. That’s where the C-section recovery underwear comes in. Even if you haven’t had a baby, the design makes sense—when you have incisions on your abdomen, you need something soft, high-waisted, and non-restrictive. These disposable underwears are a lifesaver compared to standard disposable Depends. The big difference? You can build your own pad system . Start with the underwear. Add a menstrual pad. Layer on a witch hazel perineal liner, perineal cream, or both. Attach an optional heating pad for cramping. It’s completely customizable depending on what your body needs that day. I also want to mention the liners pack...
Post a Comment
Read more

My Laparoscopy Recovery Essentials: What’s Actually Helping Me Heal

Disclaimer: Links to all the products I mentioned are included. I am not being paid to promote any of them and do not receive payments. Skin sensitivity may impact your experiences with these products. Recovering from my laparoscopy has been a journey, and honestly, some days are more uncomfortable than others. Over the past week, I’ve found a few products that have made a huge difference in how I feel—both physically and mentally. Here’s what’s been helping me get through it: 1. Body Wash That Feels Safe Before and after surgery, I wanted something gentle that still felt clean. I’ve been using Dove Antibacterial Body Wash , and it’s been perfect. It keeps the incision area clean without stinging or irritating my skin, which is such a relief.  2. Underwear That Actually Works I never thought I’d get excited about disposable underwear, but Frida Mom Disposable C-Section Underwear has been a game-changer. They’re soft, supportive, and don’t press on my stomach—exactly what ...
Post a Comment
Read more